Versus

From TeeVeePedia, the Internet TV Encyclopedia.

Versus is a new cable television network, created from the merger of the Outdoor Life Network and ESPN7. Starting in September 2006, Versus is the latest attempt to wrest the title of "Most Extreme Television Network" from networks such as ESPN2, Spike TV and G4. Starting with a line-up of professional bull riding, NFL Football pool tournaments, Survivor reruns, and hunting and fishing shows, Versus will attempt to broadcast maximum extremeness with mininum interruption for poker games.

Versus has stated that the network will be all about competition, which likely means that shows featuring humans hunting humans and bears hunting humans will soon be in production.

Actual Quotes From The Versus FAQ Page

How did you come up with the name?

• The network began soliciting name suggestions -- both internally and externally -- about a year ago. After sifting through hundreds of potential ideas, OLN began rigorously testing those the network felt had potential. Versus was the name that consistently rose to the top in focus group after focus group.

Why Versus?

• This was the culmination of a two-year network evolution. It was chosen not only because it is bold, but because it universally evokes competition. Versus will focus squarely on competition and every aspect of the competitive world. The channel will celebrate sports at its best, where athletes compete at their highest levels with the greatest passion.

No, really, why Versus?

• Versus is immediate shorthand for competition and has a range that can suit everything from stick and ball sports, to bull riding, to field sports. In focus group after focus group, it was the name that consistently rose to the top. Sports fans felt it was not only strong, but that it conveyed an idea and an energy that suggests a network experience centered on competition.

Made-Up Quotes From The Versus FAQ Page

Hey, where'd that Lance Armstrong guy go?

• Versus lost the rights to Lance to the Discovery Channel; besides, he's retired or married to that Sheryl Crow chick or something. What, they broke up??? That's news to us!

I'm one of your 3 hockey fans, what about the NHL?

• Versus is committed to the NHL. In fact, we're going to start airing Hockey Night in Canada reruns as soon as the professional bull riding season ends. We might even air a game or two, as soon as our extreme maintenance staff fixes that antenna we've got tuned to the CBC up there in Canada.

Why is OLN, I mean Versus, showing so many Survivor reruns?

• Comcast bought the tapes cheap from Les Moonves, in exchange for us giving back his wife.

So what did happen to those NFL rights? I heard that the low-rated NFL Network beat out your bid.

• Umm, err, time to end this FAQ page, if there's no more questions, we'll just call it a night, everyone.