Poochie

From TeeVeePedia, the Internet TV Encyclopedia.

Poochie is the name that television scholars have given to an immortal, life-draining succubus that preys on aging television shows. The creature attacks shows when they are on the verge of decline, and attaches itself, remora-like, to the show in the form of an irritating cast member whose unfunny antics suck all of the storytelling oxygen from the series. The inevitable result is the slow and lingering death of the series in question, while the creature itself survives and, invigorated by its fresh kill, moves on to find another series to drain.

Victims of Poochie are believed to include The Brady Bunch, destroyed by Cousin Oliver (a killing often seen as merciful), The X-Files, killed by the introduction of Monica The Whale-Singing Possibly Lesbian FBI Agent, and the BBC's Coupling, victim of an Oliver who may or may not be connected to the Oliver responsible for the Bradys. NBC's Homicide was home to what appeared to be a rare double manifestation of Poochie, in the characters of Detectives Paul Falsone and Laura Ballard (speculation that Mike Giardello constituted a third part of this manifestation is generally dismissed as nonsensical).

Frasier is a rare and notable example of a series that fended off a manifestation of Poochie, in this case as Mercedes Ruehl in that series' second season. However, much of the failure can be attributed to Poochie's tactically foolish decision to attack a young, thriving series.

At times, Poochie is preceded by a False Poochie, who behaves similarly to Poochie but is merely weakening the series' defenses to make way for the one, true Poochie. The most ready example of this is Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Many students of Poochie believed the addition of Spike to the cast in the series' fourth season was a manifestation of Poochie; however, it later became quite clear that Spike was merely paving the way for the character of Andrew in the sixth and particularly seventh seasons.

Poochie is often believed to manifest as Ted McGinley or Paula Marshall. However, it is believed that his true face has been seen only once, on an episode of The Simpsons.