Katie Couric

From TeeVeePedia, the Internet TV Encyclopedia.

Katie Couric is an American television news reporter who, for 15 years, acted as co-host of The Today Show on NBC. Her style of reporting is characterized by extreme perkiness and the tendency to dress and act twenty years younger than she actually is.

Couric is perhaps best known for the groundbreaking expedition into her colon that took place in March 2000. Her brave decision to broadcast the expedition has been pivotal in breaking down long-held stereotypes about television reporters. "I wanted the world to know that we're not just talking heads," Couric later said about the show, "but that we also have big, long tubes that poop comes out of."

Future Direction and Potential Ramifications

In April 2006, Couric announced that she would be leaving The Today Show to take over the anchor desk at CBS News, where she will be expected to dress and act thirty years older than she actually is. Scientists have cautioned that the sudden shift in perceived age may cause shockwaves throughout the electromagnetic spectrum. Ripples may be felt as far away as the Pay-Per-View channels, but the brunt of the disturbance will be taken by those near the epicenter, particularly those in and around CBS.

How the effects of this disruption will manifest is not yet clear. The leading hypothesis is that those affected will experience sudden, drastic aging, with the staff of 60 Minutes expected to spontaneously turn into several small piles of ash. Alternately, those in the immediate blast radius may become significantly younger, in which case the staff of 60 Minutes will scarcely notice a difference, as most of them are no strangers to wearing diapers.

It is hoped that the sudden aging may carry some positive effects as well; particularly if Yes, Dear finally gets old to the hundreds of apparently brain damaged Nielsen families that have been keeping it alive.