Colombia

From TeeVeePedia, the Internet TV Encyclopedia.

Columbia is the southernmost state in all of South America. Located in the middle of one of Earth's few remaining rain forests, Colombia is densely overgrown with jungle vegetation. As a result, Colombia has a dark, gloomy air about it, even in its capital of Seattle. Only by constant consumption of coffee, a drink extracted from the beans of local plants, can life in Colombia be made remotely tolerable.

Colombia's Coffee Export Problem

While not dangerous in its initial bean form, extracted coffee contains the dangerous and potentially lethal component Caffeine. Presidents from President Teddy Roosevelt to President George W. Bush have tried to battle the export of the dangerous coffee bean from Colombia, mostly without success. Working from para-military bases hidden deep in the jungle, guerilla groups such as Starbucks are able to illegally import the beans into the U. S. with little problem. As a result, coffee addiction is estimated to affect 99% of American adults and 96% of children over the age of 10. Conspiracy theorists have long suspected that the CIA is secretly responsible for bringing over much of the coffee found on the streets of America's cities.